Two is an eternal optimist.
He is also a boy of simple pleasures.
Every morning we have the same conversation. It has become somewhat of a ritual.
What would you like for breakfast, Two?
“Cake?” (no)
“Cookies?” (no)
“I-cream?” (no)
“Sweeties?” (no)
thoughtful pause
” Umm..Pigglecake?” (no!)
face starts to crumple..
How about some Weetabix?
“Okay den” he says cheerfully and chomps down a bowl or two.
After breakfast:
“Mummy? Pigglecake?”
I don’t think we’ll have Pigglecake today, perhaps again on your next birthday
“Pigglecake my lunch” he says with satisfied certainty.
I decide not to contradict him.
The odd thing is, that no matter how many times he’s denied cake, cookies, ice-cream, cookies, sweeties, Pigglecake etc. he remains ever-hopeful and is utterly convinced that it is perfectly reasonable to suggest that I serve them for main meals. He feels free to ask for whatever he wants, and even when he’s denied his desires he just waits a bit and asks again.
It’s very admirable.
I note that despite my low-sugar policy, the boy gets many more sweeties than his sister ever did. He has a way of getting around me just by being frank, charming and persistent.
I have been listlessly surfing the internet today trying to do some market research for restarting my business. For those of you who don’t know, before we moved to Stepford from London my company had just taken off in a fairly new field and I was feeling tremendously pleased with myself. I thought it would be easy to branch the company out into the USA and also take care of my new baby (are you all on the floor laughing?). I did, at least for a while, manage to do some work over here when I had just the one child, but by the time I had Two I was completely overwhelmed, plus I found it challenging being in a small town, rather than a city, to expand a professional network and generally get out and about. The combination of the isolation, domestic immersion and loss of professional identity left me feeling like I had forgotten how to participate in the grown-up world.
However, I can’t sit around moaning ALL the time ( it doesn’t pay very well) so I’ve decided to get the company out there again, hard though that may be. I will have to accept that I’ve lost the advantages that I had before – it will be like starting from almost scratch – very humbling.
From my years as a musician and from starting the business 10 years ago I am on first name terms with rejection but I’ve been a little cocooned from that in the sleepy haze of motherhood. I’ve gone soft and a bit stupid. A little scared, perhaps. I realised the other day that I spent several hours procrastinating just because I couldn’t bear to make a phone call to someone I didn’t know.
This was when I realised I needed a kick up the arse plus a large intravenous shot of courage.
I will not get where I want to be by being wistful, terrified or lamenting the loss of former glories.
I will need to take action, some of it uncomfortable, perhaps even a little painful, but it will be eased somewhat if I can train my mind to expect the outcome to be ultimately positive.
I might not get what I want straight away – a bit difficult for me being of the ‘instant gratification takes too long’ school of thought – but I must try to believe that it means that my heart’s desire is just going to turn up later in a different guise.(Pigglecake my lunch)
Open. Persistent. Unafraid.
Everyone wants Pigglecake.
Can it be that the ones who get it to have and eat it, too are just the ones who aren’t afraid to ask, ask and ask again?
{ 1 trackback }
{ 15 comments }
Oh God. This hit home.After our conversation last night, I thought & thought some more. I need a big kickass shot of that American confidence.
Or maybe some Pigglecake?
LLGxx
Pigglecake my lunch … you get out there and give it another go!
love how youre resuscitating the business … and your sense of self. so cute, that Two.
hugs.
I love two and piggle cake. You can do it girl, just channel the mad daring of your youth (more of the daring, less of the mad).
You CAN do it. While you’re at it, please would you pass some pigglecake my way?
N x
Just know and remember that YOU CAN DO IT!! You’ve got all that it needs to get there… and some more…
And can I have pigglecake for lunch too?!
Pigglecake sounds like my life. MiniMad gets so many more treats and sweet things than MaxiMad ever did. I no longer over analyse his intake and he too is the eternal optimist.
Go for it with both hands…. What is the worst that can happen?
And to top it all, Pigglecake would make a great name for website – can you think of a better conversation starter?
A very sweet and clever analogy. Good luck getting your Pigglecake!
I know exactly where you are coming from. It is always so hard to get up and go again, and especially after having kids AND moving continents. I’ve stopped work for two maternity leaves, and now the move – that’s three times in the space of five years. It’s going to take a real effort to put myself out there again. I think I’d like a slice of pigglecake too.
I’m just about to blog on this very same subject. I’m feeling that when the moment comes, you know it, and you have to get on out there and do your stuff. It’s a question of not letting the moment pass (and I feel I’ve done that quite a bit).
It is in the nature of children to be eternally optimistic–at least until they hit the teens.
It is in the nature of adults to be eternally pessimistic. We have to work at getting out of it.
Before I reply individually I’d just like to say that I am going to make another Pigglecake and give a slice to everyone who has asked. That is your reward for commenting (if you didn’t see my confectionary triumph, click on the title of the post for photographic evidence)
LLG. Funny, you seem so very confident, but then I do, too and in the meantime my legs wobble like jelly every time I have to do something new. We’ll have to take heart and dive in to new ventures! Pigglecake!
Laura, thanks so much. I will do my best
Exromana, thanks as ever for your support. And yes, that boy as delicious as…Pigglecake
Jessica. I think it most wise of you to suggest leaving the mad and keeping the daring. There are quite a few things best relegated to the past 😉
Little Brown Bird. Pigglecake for you, for SURE!
Amandeep, you have clearly ALREADY eaten Pigglecake, from what I know about you and your own courage, and I really appreciate the support!
TheMadHouse, Do we just get softer as time goes on, or are the younger ones just better at optimism?
PottyMummy. I’ll have to buy the URL! But what would it sell?
Noble Savage, tx v much xo
NVG. You must be in exactly the same situation. Very hard to get going again, especially after the big move. You get double helpings. Perhaps we should form a n expat support group with Iota?
Iota? I have also let an unmentionable number of prime moments pass and this is partly what makes me feel so lethargic. I’m coming over to see your post. And you can have a slice with BLANKIE (Two and Five fight over this bit, much coveted)
The Mother. I’m not sure I agree with you there. Not all children are optimistic and not all grownups are pessimistic. Personalities seem to be what they are from an early age although early optimism can be damaged by outside trauma and disappointment.
My younger son sounds a lot like your boy. Sweet addicted and persistent. I do think there is something for asking repeatedly for what you want. It does very little harm and someone just might say yes. best of luck to you!
You can do it! I love that post and the word ‘Pigglecake’ (and no, I’m not just commenting to get a slice of cake!)
I tagged you for a meme over at mine, if you want to join in :o)
Comments on this entry are closed.