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Always Be My Baby

by Mothership on November 26, 2009

So lovely to be back. I do love my home town.

And all my friends and my mad, mad family.

Yesterday I spent in a social whirlwind, leaving the house at 9am and not returning until well after midnight, which used to be a frequent thing in my old life, but in Stepford with the tiny ones is almost unheard of as we live ten minutes from everything and are always returning to base, like homing pigeons, for naps, snacks, forgotten precious items, or just to hang out because it’s easier. So this was very exciting for me and also made me feel like I was myself again in some essential way.

I started out by making my way to my Aunt’s house to dump the car, whisper and confer with various cousins, uncle etc. about secret present plans, dinner arrangements that evening as it was her 60th birthday and she must at all costs be spoiled and cosseted. Aunt is a mother of four grown children and now a grandmother of two rather delicious tiny ones, and while she was busy raising her kids she also managed to squeeze in a part-time job as a teacher of graphic design at a prestigious London art college, cook about forty billion delicious meals for anyone who happened to drop into her huge, beautiful house, decorate and redecorate the former in jaw-dropping style and still have time to listen patiently and non-judgementally to tearful and troubled souls who would come to sob on her already rather burdened shoulders (and perhaps empty her chocolate biscuit tin at the same time).
You might guess that I have quite frequently been one of the latter, but I am not the only one. Not by a long shot.

She is my role model for calm, competent, kind motherhood. I really don’t know how she did it. I struggle with just the two and I’m not nearly as patient.

After I had ascertained the plan for the evening I skipped off to meet Potty Mummy for a morning of Kulture at the Saatchi Gallery and immediately blew my cover of sophistication by asking pathetically if we couldn’t start off with tea and cake instead of going after the exhibition which is what you’re really supposed to do. I just couldn’t do any clever thinking before I had some carbs and sugar. (Wait, aren’t they the same thing anyway? In my book they are, the best kind of carbs, anyway.. )
She was utterly gracious. She also didn’t eat cake. Or have sugar in her tea. Ok, just me then.

We had a great time at the gallery. They have a lot of stuff in there that is not very good but is quite side-splittingly funny so I recommend it for a good giggle. It also might have been that I had been up since 3am with jet lag so was very tired and the sugar hit me just at the right moment but PM laughed too so unless she was just being polite I think I am right, here. Or I’m a big pleb, but either way, it’s free, so you might as well drop by when you’re shopping on the King’s Road and a bit cold.

Afterwards I wandered into Peter Jones (oh, the bliss) and here I fulfilled my secret mission to buy some oilcloth table covering which is going to horrify Husband, but our kitchen table is not really a table, it’s an old library desk and as such has a ‘leather’ (I use this term loosely) center which gets all sorts of disgusting food matter stuck in it unless you really scrub it.

I am the only one who really scrubs it.

I do not like doing this.

So to make life easier I am buying these very colourful and quite whizzy oilcloth table coverings you can buy by the meter in cool designs.

Mission accomplished.

I headed off to M&S to buy a see through bra strap.

You simply don’t understand how much I wanted this particular item. I’ve been thinking about it for weeks because I need it for Friday. It fits a certain bra that only comes from M&S that is the only one that works with this particular outfit and nothing else will do.

When I was signed to my old record label they gave we band members each an allowance for clothes which, at the beginning, wasn’t very much and was also, quite unfairly, the same for the boys as it was for me. I found this totally unreasonable and asked my manager to complain and ask for more.

This got me nowhere.

Finally I went in to the head of the label myself, a somewhat shy man, not used to dealing with women and said to him very directly that I needed extra money because every single outfit needed DIFFERENT SHOES and DIFFERENT BRAS or else it just wouldn’t work and at the mere mention of underwear he turned scarlet and literally got out his chequebook with his pen shaking and asked me to name an amount just to make me go away.

RESULT!

From there I met an old friend for tea at Sketch and we had a delightful catch up and then on to meet another friend for drinks at Soho House until finally it was time for the big birthday dinner.

I went to South Kensington on the tube and found my way to Rocca, a charming and inexpensive little Italian restaurant that I highly recommend, where I was greeted warmly by the staff and seated at a long table for twelve. I was the first to arrive so I went off to the loos, but by the time I came back the family had arrived.

The birthday dinner is worthy of a post in and of itself, but perhaps the most moving moment of all was seeing the  birthday girl flanked by her ninety year old father and eighty-two year old mother, opening her presents from her parents, eyes sparkling with girlish delight, and hearing the cry of joy as she found the garnet ring her elderly dad had bought for her and the look of pure love and pride in his ancient eyes as he gazed upon his little girl on her sixtieth birthday.

Our babies are our babies forever.

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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Belle_Lulu November 26, 2009 at 3:06 am

Oh gosh the last paragraph of this post made me cry unexpectedly. And lose my ability to punctuate. Am in utter jealousy of your socially exhaustive itinerary but am looking forward to my own trip to the Big Smoke more than you can imagine. What shoes will you be wearing on Friday?? xx

2 Rosie Scribble November 26, 2009 at 3:20 am

Oh what a wonderful post and, yes, the last paragraph made me sniffle too.

3 shayma November 26, 2009 at 3:51 am

i love the amount of fun you are having, mtff. cake and tea before art? it’s obvious why we’re friends. whenever i went to the museum w my friends in italy- they all told me- we have to have un caffè and “relax ourselves” before spending time browsing in the museum. i love how italians “relax themselves” with caffeine. brilliant!

how wonderful for your aunt to have you there to celebrate with her- i wish her a very, very happy birthday. and mashallah (she says, after claiming to be non-religious in deililly’s post) her parents are still around, which is so wonderful. you made me laugh throughout the post and then you made me cry at the end when you wrote about the garnet ring. that is the beauty in the way you write.

have a really, really nice time, wish i could be there to see you perform.
xx

4 Potty Mummy November 26, 2009 at 5:16 am

They are our babies forever, aren’t they? (Note to self; call my mother). As for the oilcloth, how on earth did you manage without one for so long? I guess it’s showing my extreme uncoolness that we have one firmly in place and the lovely table beneath only sees the light of day for high days and holidays. As for the cake (and not having it) my sincere apologies for not being your partner in crime, it’s very unlike me – although I must point out that you don’t know what I had for breakfast, how late that was, and you didn’t mention the hot chocolate I inhaled whilst you delicately ate your croissant. So I’m not such an abstemious person, after all, I promise!

5 So Lovely November 26, 2009 at 5:35 am

I’m so happy you are back in London and having a brilliant time. Just your travels bring back so many memories. Love Peter Jones and remember being carted off there one school break as my father decided I needed a suede suit. Riiiight! That’s what every 14 year old girl needs – isn’t it? xxx

6 Nicola November 26, 2009 at 5:51 am

So Jealous! Glad you are having fun at home (and your description of Potty Mummy had me scratching my head….so glad you cleared up my misconception Potty – would have been sure you would have taken advantage of cake on a normal day!)

7 London City Mum November 26, 2009 at 6:29 am

Aha! PM had told me you were due to meet up but please believe me when I say I was not stalking anyone but happened to be sitting in Duke of York Sq, right outside gallery entrance, with Widget chasing pigeons and eating his (early) lunch, yesterday as well.

I spent the time taking covert photos of all the Yummy Mummies parading around with offspring (sadly I was not one of them) as topic for future post. So if anything, maybe I was stalking them?

Glad you had such a lovely day.

LCM x

8 TheMadHouse November 26, 2009 at 9:01 am

Oh how lucky to have family all together nad to have your dad and mum at 60. It makes me all warm inside. I am getting very envious of the meet up through

9 Helena November 26, 2009 at 9:32 am

What a lovely uplifting day you had. It’s nice to remember how life was before babies and good to have a bit of time just to think of yourself? Of course, now mine have left, I find it incredibly difficult, but then that’s another story (or post).

Helena xx

10 The Divorcee November 26, 2009 at 11:20 am

Our babies are indeed our babies forever, however much we forget this as we wrangle and tussle with them along the way. I caused my mother pain, much of, along our way but hope not to again. I look back in some slight shame regarding my own shenanigans and hope (pray) that Daughter and I navigate/negotiate our way as peacefully as possible. Before I know it she shall have left and as Helena says, that is of course another story.
I hope for weather-beaten tables, worn from tea and sympathy, friends, life and tears, just like your lovely Aunt’s. And that one day that we shall all come back to it gladly.
Enjoy your time here and fun to be had. Bisous xx

11 geekymummy November 26, 2009 at 7:45 pm

Lovely! I hope my daddy will be there for my 60th. Though he will be 95 by then, a sobering thought.
Love South Ken (I went to Imperial College), love the Kings Road, the nostalgia It is all Christmassy and cold? I can’t stand it, I need to go!

12 nappyvalleygirl November 27, 2009 at 6:07 am

Lovely post. I hope I’m around to see my boys turn 60( can’t quite imagine them at the moment). You sound as if you are having a wonderful time.

13 Mothership November 27, 2009 at 6:16 am

BL. The social whirlwhind is actually killing me! I have had to notch it down a bit. I am wearing black sequinned sneakers as I can no longer dance in heels – I just fall on my arse. Not as elegant as it might be, but less risky.
Rosie S. Believe it or not, I did not know I was going to write the last para before I did and then I boo hooed, too!
Shayma. I can’t wait until we can go to a museum coffee shop together. One day it will happen, perhaps a Smithsonian? Thank you for your kind words. We have a mutual admiration society ;)
PM. I didn’t have an oilcloth before because a) the US ones are hideous and b) last time I was here I forgot what size our table was and c) Husband has been too resistant and I did care a bit what he thought UNTIL NOW. The mess reached a critical mass and I’m going for it. I have always been that uncool, I just haven’t been that practical yet. It’s true, I didn’t mention your hot choc, but it was LIQUID and that doesn’t count ;)
So Lovely. Suede suit? I don’t know what a girl of your age NOW would need with one! Even though the 80’s are back!!!
Nicola I would be jealous, too, if it wasn’t me, if you know what I mean. It was a sublime day.
LCM. How WEIRD! I wish I’d known, it would have been so nice to meet you.
MadHouse. I am SO glad I came for the family birthday. That one scene made the whole trip worth it. A golden moment.
Helena. Id like to read that post. It is good to be reminded of how lucky I am to be in the thick of it with the children on days when they are driving me bananas, too.
Divorcee. I’m pretty sure we learn from our dramas with our mamas and pass on the good lessons but make mistakes of our own. And the tables will bear testimony to that, oilcloth or no, eh? Let’s all hope for joyous 60th birthdays, us AND our daughters and that we’re present at both (I’ll be bloody ANCIENT at hers if I make it at all!)
Geekymummy. It IS all Christmassy and cold. You need to make a trip home and do a spot of shopping and memory lane walking. It’s good for the soul. xo

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